Post from IPhone

I was sitting and staring at my computer exhausted from the day. It was another day "off" when I worked tirelessly as if I would be paid per chore or for overtime. I ate more fruits and veggies in one day than I did all week and logged every measured morsel. I sorted, washed, dried and folded laundry. And there are still mounds waiting for freshness. I dusted and vacuumed and rearranged. I cleared away brittle swags of evergreens and tucked away things for a new canvas to decorate. And in between the tedious and mundane I found things to make my heart smile. In between repetitious and regular I created things that made me happy. When purging pushed me to the brink of tears I moved to something softer and lighter. I have learned something in these forty years and that is how to make the best of something. I was also very excited to do something tonight and chose duty and responsibility over selfishness so I guess I have grown after all. I also changed systems, got out of my way, forged new paths of communication and practiced the ways of the peaceful warrior. I faltered as well. I had many moments of self doubt and fear. I did not make the calls I was supposed to. I left the lunches to be packed in the morning. I let a nightmare haunt me for too long before I approached it with the correct eye. I didn't take time for myself or reach out to those I love. But I did carefully cut and create a collage of photos on my fridge to stare at when it all gets hard and set up my new tiny spectrum of bowls to make the grey of winter just a little prettier. I made a new recipe in the crockpot but for some reason my pork tenderloin with sauerkraut didn't even pop into my head as I panicked tonight because my real "new thing" fell through until another time. The beauty of this new wiring is that the new starts to become the norm and you forget that you've done a ton of new things. You cleaned another portion of her closet without crying. You made the photo collage better than ever. You put out the pretty new bowls in a row. You had breakfast eaten, kids dropped off, laundry started and dinner in a slow cooker with a brand new recipe all by nine. And in between there were other new things. You sit there and realize that all of that happened but because something bigger happened in your head and heart today you didn't even think of those "simple" things. So you sit at a computer waiting for inspiration. I have never posted to my blog by typing all of this out on a little iPhone keyboard. Until now. It's slower than typing on a computer keyboard but it also allows your brain to slow and allows the emotion to creep in between each word. I am tired yes...but I am damn proud of myself for so many reasons- one of them being that I am so truly imperfect. But real. More real than yesterday and not as real as tomorrow but with a sore hand and a stiff neck for attempting all this on this phone. I will go to bed now knowing that I squeezed lots of juice out of this lemon and that it might be one of the best glasses of lemonade ever.

Tres Birthdays

     I believe somewhere around 16 of us gathered together over some pizzas and two types of cake to celebrate three birthdays amongst the cousins.  Life takes you funny places and sometimes the very cousins you grew up with fall away for a bit.  You grow up and move and have families and move and then suddenly you are all living within fifteen minutes of one another yet again.  Decades later.  States away from where it all originated.  Need more of a reason than that to celebrate?  How about the fact that three of them have birthdays days from each other.  So to John, Christine and Tara we all say happy birthday and hope that this Tres Birthdays celebration becomes a tradition complete with chocolate cake for some and the Tres Leches cake for the others!!!

Cake with the Martes

     It's been a long time since Andrea has been to the house.  So long in fact that I had never met daughter number two...and she's five.  Shame on us.  We have reconnected at reunions and have danced and eaten and shared some wine together but this time we ALL got together.  New friendships were made with our little ones and pets were loved in a big way.  We shared some pizzas and some Carvel to honor two people that share the same birthday.  Here's to some more of these visits.  Rumor has it that a date has been set already by an adorable little girl! Can't wait to see you all again!!!

Silver Linings Playbook

     I don't like to do movie reviews but I will say that I loved this film.  I'm also glad that they approached the mental health issues found in this movie in the way that they did.  Plus, a girl can always love a happy ending.

A Whole New Philly

     My Mom was from Philadelphia.  My grandmother and sister also lived there the whole time I was growing up in the Bronx.  We went to Philly often.  Spent lots of time with my sister.  But the "Philthadelphia" that I knew from the 70's and 80's is different now.   I've taken trips there from time to time since of course but my image of the city was biased and unfair.  We tend to do that as grownups.  Part of this new eye that I see the world with has returned me to a youthful optimism that lets me see things for the first time.  This day in Philly was wonderful.  Now I am a little sad that the gritty punk scene of South Street has been taken over by fro yo joints and Starbucks but in the summer I will look at the street with a whole new eye as well.  For a girl that grew up spending a lot of time in this city I sure did experience a whole day of new...

1.  Shake Shack.  I've been to one in NY but never this location.  It was small and not overly packed and the one employee took time to come over and speak with us. 

2.  A few doors down we checked out a comic book store and a record shop.  Both cool.

3.  The shopping district included stops in Anthropologie (the building was worth the shopping experience not really being a huge fan of the store), Mac store, Urban Outfitters and the like.  It's been a long time since I've perused the items in stores like these and though no major purchases happened it was nice to window shop a bit. 

4.  Parc.  Gorgeous restaurant recommended by my foodie buddy, Ryan.  I stepped back in time with the decor and devoured my scallops and pureed celery root with chestnuts and truffle oil.  I see these types of dishes on Top Chef and this evening I got to eat one. 

5.  Red Mango.  A tiny squirt of frozen yogurt with some blueberries and strawberries as dessert.

6.  Louis CK.  These tickets were a Christmas gift to John.  I hurt from laughter after an hour and a half of his hilarity.  I still just randomly laugh if I think of one of his jokes.

7.  Pat's Steaks.  Yep, I went 40 years splitting time between NY and Philly and NEVER ate at the famous steak joints.  Shame, shame, shame.  Finally can check that one off of my list. 

Oh and how could I forget...we started off the whole trip with a surprise detour to the site of Rocky Balboa's house on some nasty garbage ridden street that reminded me in retrospect of the Philly I remember.  All cities have their nasty and their glory but it's finding the beauty in both that counts I guess. 

So to Philly I say...I'll be back...and way MORE often.  I can't wait to take the kids to more museums and more restaurants.  I am way excited to take them to the historical parts.  I will also drive them down the ghetto streets of their grandmother's old neighborhood and remind them that it's never where you are from but where you are going.  Thanks, Philly...for everything.
    

Nirvana & Lumosity

     New nail color.  It's a pretty warm brown that reminds me of chocolate pudding.   It gave me time to do something.  I have to let it dry and it forces me to sit.  If I sit I can think.  If I think I remember things I keep forgetting.  Ironically, this process led me back to Lumosity.com.  I saw a commercial for it the other day.  It is a website designed to give your brain a workout.  We joke about how we play all of these little phone games that waste time but there's something to be said about the exercising we our giving to our noggin.  So I signed up for the free portion and have done one test so far.  Now in between rounds of Gems with Friends and Candy Crush I can at least play a game that is supported by some sort of scientific something or other.  ;)

National Nothing Day

I saw this on Facebook today:

Today is 'NATIONAL NOTHING DAY".........really! Was too good not to share.
National Nothing Day is an "un-event" proposed in 1972 by columnist Harold Pullman Coffin and observed annually on January 16 since 1973, when it was added to Chase's Calendar of Events. Its purpose is to provide Americans with one National day when they can just sit without celebrating, observing or honoring anything.

This was a few hours a snow day had been declared by the district.  I was jubilant.  Gleeful.  Ecstatic.  
Lots has been going on as usual so I was thrilled with the idea to chill a bit.  We caught up on our recorded Ellens and then were actually way more productive than we should've been on nothing day.  

Now back to our regularly scheduled busy...