Fish, Citrus, Fish, Citrus

Made tuna for lunch.

Needed to get rid of smell.  While cleaning like a maniac today I remembered Frank's post about simmering orange peels and cinnamon.  So I ate an orange and got to simmerin'. 

Made a new recipe with tilapia.

Side dish included honey, fresh ginger, olive oil, s/p, cucumbers, pineapple and LIME. 

House smells again.  Might need to repeat simmering goodness. 

Steve Hofstetter

     Stand up comedy at the local university coffee shop is always fun.  Free makes it even better.  Sometimes you catch a comedian right before their big break and sometimes you never here from them again but either way you laugh for a bit.  Steve was funny and smart while being dirty and political.  He plays really well with a crowd, too.  Still seems like just yesterday I was in charge of some of those events at ESU...sigh.  Well, at least I'm still laughing.

A Day with Facebook Fabio

     I started watching Top Chef at the inception of the series.  Some chefs were awesome and some were jerks but they each brought an ingredient that made the show tasty.  Then there was Fabio.  He was a skilled chef and a handsome Italian but he was kind and funny and genuine.  He has a pet turtle that he takes for walks for goodness sake.  So while other chefs have come and gone out of the limelight I have tried to keep tabs on him and how his career is shaping up.  I followed him on Twitter and if you read my blog then you know we communicated once and I got very excited about it.  It just might have been my "do the new" for the day.  I also follow him on FB.  Well, yesterday he posted a link to an event that is happening at Mt. Airy Casino in the Pennsylvania.  Ummmmm....that's like ten minutes away.  Ohhhhhh AND it's on September 8th.  My head almost popped off with excitement. What could be better than facing the big 4-0...maybe acting like I'm 15?!?  So I added a comment to thread to let him know that it was indeed so close to me and on my birthday.  He responded later on in the thread with this: "if i do not see you happy birthday".  Giddy. I was giddy.  Did he write it?  Of COURSE he did.  (Yes, I know famous people have publicists and interns solely for this job of social media but this is me and Fabs...HE WROTE IT!) I thought "liking" my comment was great but to add a whole line of text to ME.  I was swooning.  It doesn't take much though...let's be honest.  So I woke up early this morning and purchased two tickets as a birthday gift to me.  I made it this far serving up goodness to others and I will reward myself with a sampling of goodies that someone is serving up to me.  See you on the 8th Viviani! I'll be the giggling idiot with the birthday tiara and sash winking the whole time...

Downward Dog with my Downward Dog

     I've been waking up a little stiff and sore these days.  Today, I went back to some morning stretches.  Then I brought some old yoga moves that might make my neck and back feel a little less rotten.  My pooch followed me to the floor.  She checked out what I was doing and when I took the downward dog position she tucked underneath me as if going under a bridge.  We then stretched together almost as if she knew what she was doing.  I told my daughter about this and when she tried it the dog did the same exact thing.  Apparently she knows yoga.  I knew she was a special dog I just didn't know how special.

Face Off Marathon

     I love learning about a new process.  Without going to school for something new it can be quite tricky to stay captivated by new topics.  Sometimes tv can help give us a window to the world.  Yes, there are horrible shows that waste precious time but others give us a new experience without leaving our home.  It is why my kids know about foods from around the world, how animals behave in the wild and what techniques can be used to  do a bazillion different things.  Sometimes it crosses over to entertaining and educating at the same time and even gives us a new perspective on something we didn't know much about.  We spent a morning relaxing and watching Face Off.  It is a show about the world of makeup and special effects for film and tv.  It is quite intriguing.  You learn about the process and the chemicals and the artistic directions that go with the themes.  It gives you a behind the scenes look at a world you might not even know existed.  It will also train us to give films an additional layer of depth and admire the creativity that is behind these artists.  We are excited about the new season!

Hope Springs

     I would like to coin the term "mapathy".  It's what happens when a married couple lets their marriage slip into apathy.  It happens in other places as well....but not like here.  I have thought about this whole theory since college when writing different papers forced me to think of issues.  Tonight I saw the movie that served as a bookend  to the topic. 

*When you are in a sport as a child you perform for the trophy.  The win.  The medal. The title. The next colored belt.  The rank of captain.  The championship.

*When you go to school you compete for the titles that accompany it.  Prom Queen. Valedictorian.   Football captain.  President.  And finally the degree.  The certificate and gown that says you have accomplished something.  You might even go on to further your education and add an associate, bachelor,  or masters degree.  Maybe even a doctorate.  You will get to wear extra colors on your gown and walk a little bit taller across the stage.

*Someday when you grow up you will get a job.  You will be paid for it.  You will receive a check, benefits, a 401K, retirement plan, bonus, vacation, perhaps even a sick day or 20.  You will have a title on the door or a business card to pass out.  You will be included on a website or at the very least have something to write under the "info" section of Facebook.  You will receive a plaque to hang in the office if you go above and beyond and accomplish something big.  A promotion might give you a corner office.  You will buy that convertible or beach house or take that trip around the world because all of that hard work that made it possible.  A building might stand where you once put up beams.  A child might know how to read because you taught them.  The possibilities are endless.

*When you have children you will be compared always to others.  Did you breastfeed or use a family bed.  Is your child pretty, smart, tall, fit, athletic, musical, gifted and as well adjusted as the others.  You will watch them win awards and trophies and prizes...almost as if they are just an extension of you from before.  They are a product of you now aren't they?

....and then there is marriage.  You have a party...maybe a trip to celebrate.  You get gifts because for some strange reason we give gifts to people who have found someone to love.  You vow to spend the rest of your life with someone.  There is no paycheck.  No fancy title like "CEO of the Smith Couple".   In fact...there is no measuring stick.  There is no accountability.  No itemized tax return of the partnership of marriage.  No brackets or March Madness.  There is a simple pass/fail gym class type system in which we either show up for ski class or we don't.  We live together or we break up and go our separate ways.  Miserable, happy, complete, empty, rich, poor, sick, healthy.  Mapathy settles in because nothing is telling us if we are getting an A+ this semester.  There is no progress report.  There are no division championships.  There are no leads in the play.  No scholarships are given out.  Heck, we don't even get sick days or bonuses for the minimum wage job we shlep to every day.  Fantasy Football leagues have a greater measuring stick for their systems than we do for the biggest commitment we can make in our lives.  One bad habit one day leads to many bad habits for many days.  One tiny hurt here leads to fortress walls of stones there.  One lazy afternoon becomes one lazy decade.  This doesn't mean you didn't mow the lawn properly but the partnership is lost...somewhere...somehow...the apathy settles in.  We forget what we loved.  We stop fighting for what is necessary.  We back down from what is important.  We settle.  We take the path of least resistance.  We withdraw.  And somewhere in the thorns and bricks and walls and traps we lose sight of the person we couldn't live without.  The person we said we'd spend forever with.  There is no Marriage Idol or the Great Marriage Race.  If we're lucky we get a tax break or group health benefits.  And we love someone of the same sex we might not even get that even though we have committed to be with them forever.  It's really no wonder we have a huge divorce rate.  There is no prize.  It is all hard work, intrinsic motivations and struggle.  We are a society based on a value system.  Value meals, value packs, rewards, coupons, limelight deals and vouchers.  What do we get out of it??? What is the perk??? What about me???  It's why we forget New Year's resolutions by February...ditch the diets by week seven...forget our dreams and hobbies...lose touch with our friends.  Apathy settles in when there is no "payment".  But marriage...partnership...relationships...they are the hardest.  They take the most work for the least reward...especially if they are not good ones.  This doesn't mean the good ones don't exist or that they aren't possible...but I bet if you know a GOOD COUPLE you know TWO people who are working their asses off to fight the good fight.

If you are not you will end up in Hope Springs. 

Ruby Sparks

     What would we do if we could "write" someone?  The more I thought about this question the more I realized...in fact...it IS what most of us do most of the time.  We write who we want someone to be.  The potential of what we think they could be for us becomes what we expect...sometimes demand.  We do this with our employers, partners, friends, children...ourselves.  It might be the very thing that causes all of those break-ups out there in the world.  First we write them...and then when they change, losing the very essence that we first loved...we don't like them anymore.  We write ourselves as well.  Instead of living true to our hearts we become what others need us to be. 
     This movie was very good.  As I broke down the theme and my interpretation of the message I realized it wasn't as far fetched as the movie makes it.  It is really how we all live.  Well, not all...I should never cast us all under the same big umbrella.  That would just be me writing how I think we all are...see...I got the movie. ;)
     Most of my peers are right in the "about to end it all by turning 40" mode.  Go see this movie.  At the end of it throw away the mental novel you have been writing about yourself and those around you and start with a blank piece of paper.  Just like Ruby...be free. 

Shared a Rack with Hannah

     There was a big rack and a rowdy table...but what happens at the Sycamore (for Leigh Ann's birthday dinner celebration)...stays at the Sycamore. 

Planters NUTrition

     Days are full of last minute summer activities and prepping for another year of school.  The sun is setting earlier and the minutes are whipping by at a record pace.  I know there is only a short time to hold on to the peace and calm of these last few days.  I grabbed a jar of this stuff at the store a week or so ago and passed up getting a jar of the bad cookie stuff that seems to be all the talk.  I saved it.  This morning we snuggled for a bit and caught up on a little tv while devouring toast smothered in cinnamon raisin granola nut butter.  It is tasty and the protein gives you what you need to make a piece of toast last until lunch.  Great snack idea for lunch boxes or for a quick breakfast when needed.  Might even be great on some celery. 
     I'd like to send a shout out to all of the Moms out there in the back-to-school-make-it-all-count scurry.  We bust our asses to find the shoes, get the supplies, figure out new lunch ideas, do new charts and calendars and then worry about the nine million little details for the next ten months.  Take a breath and grab a snuggle because the stuff will always be there but the little ones won't.  If you can grab that snuggle with a yummy little treat...even better!!!

Fruitbow

     We often talk of Pinterest at work.  What I love about Pinterest besides the million recipes and braid ideas is the fact that sometimes we just don't think outside the box...and it reminds us to.  Let's take fruit for example - we have eaten it always and if we need to put it all together we go for the mixed bowl of fruit salad.  Occasionally, you might see a watermelon turned into a basket or something but typically it's the same old thing.  Then Pinterest comes along and says, "Hey, make it into a rainbow!".  Uh...duh.  I'm a rainbow freak so why did I NOT think of that?!?
     We were brainstorming ideas for our Monday morning meeting/Leigh Ann's birthday treat and of course cupcakes, cakes and ice cream popped up.  But this is a meeting at 9am and Leigh Ann is a healthy girl so I was sorry it took so long to think of it but when I did I was elated.  I could make her the thing we had talked about loving on Pinterest.
     Strawberries, cantaloupe, pineapple, kiwi, blueberries and grapes made a lovely bow.  Big fluffy clouds of Cool Whip featuring blueberries in the shapes of the appropriate numbers made it complete.  It was gorgeous, healthy, fun and just right for a morning treat.  Thanks, Pinterest and happy, happy, happy birthday to my friend, Leigh Ann!

Paranorman

     Don't expect a cute little kiddy cartoon here because you won't get one.  It is dark.  It is deep.  It touches the heart and left people with quiet little tears streaming.  It covers big topics.  From a film point of view it is mind-blowing.  The angles are "shot" in a beautiful way but the replacement animation takes the whole process to a new level.  The details are incredible.  The characters are rich.  The writing is clever.  Plus there are zombies...and everyone likes a good zombie. 

A Night with Anna

     Emily has a BFF.  They are twins in so many ways it's scary but different enough to keep things interesting.  They missed the heck out of each other this summer so I promised a sleepover at some point.  They are in band together and have shared two weeks of band camp prepping for a special concert.  We all gathered at the high school to listen to pieces from the 5th grade all the way through high school.  Each band was a bit more seasoned than the younger ones before but all good.  They came together at the end with the Fight Song.  My little fifth grader sat in front of a big high school guy playing the same music.  These are the moments when you watch the layers of your child grow right in front of your very eyes.  She walked a little taller that night.
     Then there was the sleepover.  We had a huge dinner and played a fun game.  Then they headed to bed to giggle about Mad Libs and the things that girls that age laugh about.  It was a great time and we are already planning some future sleepover activities.  Let the giggles begin.

Black Diamond Ride

     Huge amusement park fan here...HUGE! I am a coaster fanatic and though my body hates spinny rides I can still appreciate their essence.  I love a good train ride around the park and will take any opportunity to "drive" a car, boat or vehicle.  But it's hard to find something original after all of these years.  There is a new ride at Knoebels that is quite unique.  It's a three story "coaster" that takes you on a journey of the coal miner.  Sounds weird I realize...but the experience is different...in a good way.  It is part history lesson, part homage to the life a coal miner, part scary and part fun.  It is also on a track that takes you up and down with different speeds.  I went in quite dubious at the extra ticket price that would cost us nine dollars to ride but it was worth it.  Now if only they would figure out Flying Turns...but then again it will be one great new thing for next summer.

Haunted House and Timing

     It is the great challenge of the mother to know when things are right.  We need to be aware of timing.  One push too soon can be damaging.  A wait too long can be sad.  This is the balance we strive to give to our children.  When I was young my mother found the highest wedge sandals that she could in order to fool the woman in the height booth of the Dragon Coaster in Rye.  This was wrong on so many levels but I'll leave it for the therapy sessions.  I did love the kiddy coasters that I had ridden previously but was I ready for the big guy?  Nope.  Yet, there I was terrified at a ride that probably could've waited one more summer.  I guess after the string of movies that I viewed in the theaters that summer it was no big deal...but that's another therapy session.  My point is that some things in life are about timing.  If you pull the pole out too quickly you will lose the fish.  If you hit the flipper too late you will lose your multi-ball.  Last year I felt it was time for my little man to hit the big coaster.  It was perfect and we both enjoyed the ride together.  But after spending too many nights convincing the crying little guy that monsters weren't real I knew it was not time for the dark place full of terror.  This year I knew he was ready.  We celebrated together.  He is at the age when he is trying so hard to be brave so I did some of the work for him.  We rode together.  I kept my hand on his leg.  I warned him about the strings that would trickle down upon on his head.  (I also was sure to ride early in the morning so that it had time to wear off before beddy bye.)  Everything else was up to him.  He closed his eyes and jumped right out of his seat at certain parts.  I could tell he was scared to death.  When the ride was over we did a high five and he went back into "brave" mode as he talked about how cool it was with his older sister.  He trusts me now.  I spent a lot of time on this trip letting them make decisions and by the end of the trip they understood that I am thoughtful and a bit more experienced in my old age...and maybe they can listen just a little bit longer to Mom.  I'll take any minutes I can get...because I know what's coming.  But then again I know the headlights and loud truck horn honk are coming at the end of the dark hallway in the haunted house and yet it gets me every time!!!

Fire and Bananas

     There are certain occasions when tradition is something to fight for...but in those moments it is hard to find something new.  We try to hold on to the magic that worked before.  We want a sense of deep roots even when the dirt is shallow and the growth is young.  This is when creativity can help.  And Pinterest doesn't hurt either.
     This is our second annual camping trip to the same place with a request for the SAME site because it is simply perfect.  I can't tell you the letter and number for fear that the world will learn of it.  Same tent and sleeping bags.  Same special guest and goodies.  But this time instead of regular old s'mores we tried something new.  You split a perfectly ripe banana down the middle and stuff chocolate and marshmallows down into it and toast over the open fire.  You get a luscious dessert that can be eaten right out of the peel. 

Extra new thing alert:
There is a store that is passed each time we venture to Knoebel's.  Each time I have seen the name of it and cringed...sometimes I even rant silently. Ok, sometimes not so silently.  The name of this sweet little farm store shares the name of a not so sweet woman who crushed me on a daily basis while student teaching some twenty years ago.  Each time I go by I think of her.  I remembered a passage about "putting the woman down" and how much I lecture others on this thinking.  Why am I allowing something that happened half of my life ago to hinder me so?  Because that's what people do when they are stuck.  This time we stopped.  We were rewarded....with fresh peaches, delicious tomatoes (that sat out like a box of candy they were so sweet) and a small container of gummy peaches.  AND the pooch got a fresh bone that kept her quite happy by the fire.  The store was wonderful and I had been missing it all of this time because of old wounds.  Each day is a practice on how to get better and be better we just have to find the ways. 

     Now enough of this inspirational message...go light a fire and roast some nanners!!!

totally biased w W. Kamau Bell

     I am very excited about a new show.  The first episode was brilliant.  It pushes and pulls at very serious issues but does it with comedy...a mixture I have always loved.  W. Kamau Bell...I can't wait for more!

Brene Brown and Vulnerability

     I watched an inspirational speaker tonight thanks to a "share" on Facebook by my dear, Theresa.  I know I have watched bits of Brene Brown before but today the timing was special.  I have been walking through life on such a mission but occasionally there is a weak spot and I falter.  They are getting more infrequent and less substantial but they happen nonetheless.  Today, I took a slow car ride home on a curvy back road and tried to listen to the messages.  I took in the beauty of the scenery.  I listened to a lovely song.  I felt the warm air on my skin.  I let the tears fall.  I tried to practice the very lessons I try to teach others.  I tried to practice the ones for myself.  But it isn't always easy. 
     The very things I heard in the video clip were the very things that keep coming up with the people I care about.  They have also been a theme.  The vulnerability, the numbing, the shame, the love...it is all intertwined.  It is what causes destruction with the people we care about the most.  They are the very things that stop us from living the full life that we could be living.  We have to reach out and be vulnerable.  It is hard.  And yet I practice everyday.  In fact, today I told a friend that I loved her and told another that I missed her terribly.  I send out random emails, messages and texts lately telling people how I feel.  I ask when I need help.  I nag when there is silence.  I put my hand out to the stubborn.  Sometimes it is unbearable but I do it anyway.  Maybe if we all did it nobody would have to get hurt.  Maybe if one shows others that it is ok...more will follow.  Maybe we could all put down our weapons and just be kind.  Somehow I doubt it but the listening to this wise "researcher storyteller" made it all make just a little bit more sense for me tonight.  And I needed it.  So thank you universe for answering the question.  Thank you even more for giving me the gift of the people who answered it!  ;)

ENJOYED Back to School Shoe Shopping

     It has become tradition that Gramary comes on out a few weeks before school starts to get the kids some new kicks.  The amount of enjoyment one gets out of this activity is somewhere between the dentist and cleaning out the garage.  Alright, so I'm exaggerating but it is usually a long tricky session of huffing, squeezing, bickering, pleading...well...you get the idea. 
     This time I went in with my new and improved attitude.  I knew it would be awesome.  I believed.  Not only did each child come out with the perfect collection of shoes but I had one of my hardest laughs in years.  Tears poured.  I could barely breathe.  Mary was squatting near the rack of shoes and leaned back on a shelf and popped it right out of the bracket.  A cascade of shoes followed her to the floor.  (No one was injured during this episode so feel free to smile...nobody will know.) It reminded me of the I Love Lucy episode where the bread just kept coming out of the oven and though you knew it was in no way possible you laughed anyway.  I could not believe how the shoes just KEPT COMING.  There were only so many on the shelf and yet they seemed endless.  I tried to pick them up but the laughter got the best of me.  The sales associate could not even get angry because I was such a giggling goon.  I will laugh each time I see the new shoes. Talk about a gift that keeps on giving!!!
     Thanks to the best grandmother EVER for another great shopping spree and one of the best laughs yet!!!! Love you, Gramary!!!

Raining Cats and Dogs

     We had a theme with a mission this weekend at MudWorks.  We wanted to help some animals find some homes.  Together with Safe Haven (a group that fosters pets until they find families), Kitchen Chemistry, the 4H, Popcorn Buddha, several area artists and the love and dedication of the staff at MudWorks we gathered for a day of hope.  Some nice people found some new furry friends and a community came together.  It was nice to be on that side of it...and we look forward to making it a tradition. 

Steel Stacks

     I have seen Sheryl.  In fact, I have seen her WITH Jenne.  So how was I going to swing this as a new thing?  Well, I have NEVER seen any show at the brand new Steel Stacks in Bethlehem.  They took a nasty mess of a place full of lost hope and ghosts and turned it into something wonderful.  The tall stacks loom over the backdrop of the stage with dancing colors of lights. 
     Jenne treated me to a night for the girls.  It was a summer night with perfect weather and the perfect friend to share it with.  We did some dancing and some singing while we watched a woman we simply could not believe was 50.  She was rockin' it in between stories of her children and switching out instruments.  I sat there and listened to lyrics I have heard a million times before and yet they meant so many new things to me now.  Some of them brought tears to my eyes.  Some made me sing a little bit louder.  It also served as a reminder of the thing that I keep trying to convince myself of but tend to forget...I am the youngest I will ever be.  A big birthday is coming quicker each day and yet there is a feeling of peace with it all.  Besides, if Sheryl can make 50 look that good there is still hope!

    And to Jenne I say...May we always be the girls that get yelled at for standing up to dance and sing at a concert no matter how old we get!!!

Claressa Shields

     "I don't like boxing!", I blurted as soon as I saw it on the television.   We have been watching and thoroughly enjoying so much of the Olympics but I was drawing the line at watching two individuals beating each other in the head. 

     Then came the back story.  Damn...those back stories.  I should know better.  They get me every time.  In fact, as it started up I sighed and knew in a matter of moments I would be giving in.  Claressa Shields has had a tough life.  She has taken those challenges to the boxing ring and made it into something good.  By the end of the story I was eager to watch as she competed.  I was rooting for her and what it took for her to get there.  I was cheering for her spirit. 

She took the gold. 

     All of these months later and I still blurt that I don't like something every here and there.  It's rare.  Most of the time I welcome new things with an open heart and the gratitude for the gift that it is.  But the deep ones...the long running ones...sometimes are stubborn.    I just needed someone to knock it right out of me and remind me to be open.  I'm just glad she did it with a story and not a real punch!!!
Congratulations to a woman that made us all proud.  A first for the country and a new thing for me. 

Risotto Milanese

     I purchased a box of arborio rice so long ago I don't even remember when it was.  I know I was mesmerized by the thought of making my own risotto for years after watching it being made on all of the cooking competition shows.  It intimidated me so.  I mean Gordon has been screaming at his blue and red chefs for years about making it ALL WRONG...so how could I possibly swing it?!?  I was even given a cookbook dedicated JUST to risotto years ago that has sat unstained and clean with neglect.  You know the recipes that I love by how dirty the pages are.  A few weeks ago I came home to the smell of pure heaven.  Seems a pot of chicken stock had been made complete with herbs, veggies and spices.  Immediately, I thought of planning ahead a bit and I busted out one of my latest cookbooks for some recipe ideas.  There it was a again taunting me...risotto.  I froze some in containers complete with a page number to a recipe that would guide me through the steps.  Someday.... when I was brave enough...in a good enough place...feeling bold. 
     Wednesday, August 8th was that day.  I lined up my ingredients, put on music that made me happy, cleared the space of distractions and dug right in.  It was effortless.  Seamless.  Fun.  It was also one delicious bowl of creamy goodness.  The best part? My new Weight Watchers book smiled at me as I stirred the heaven.  A girl can battle a fear, keep to her points and have a bowl of yummy all at one time!

Big Lots

     I'm not a big shopper for many reasons.  This means if I don't have a specific mission I don't really get to many stores.  This time I had a few reasons (and therefore justification in my own mind) to go to a place called Big Lots.  It was entertaining if anything.  Never before had I seen such a sampling of low budget international snack foods...let alone right there in the same store as "leather" couches.   It took extreme measures to get me there and would probably take even bigger ones to get me there again! But it's new and sometimes a girl has to do what a girl has to do!

The Lumineers

     I have heard bits and pieces and little hints of their music but today was...

     ALL THEM, ALL DAY.

     The way to work.  The way home.  If I was in my car I was listening.  Tomorrow is a busy day of running around and guess what we will be listening to?  They make you want to smile, drum along and sing at the top of your lungs with the sunroof open.  I may be a little late to the party for you super cool peeps who know the new music before it's even written but I'm showing up when it's gettin' good!!!!  For the rest of you too busy to concentrate on things like the next big band be sure to give them a listen!!!!

Epsom Salt Foot Bath

     My dogs have been barkin'.  Last year I had a great deal of pain in both feet and after some self diagnosing I took the steps to get better.  This summer I seem to have some new issues and by the end of the day I need ibuprofen and ice to soothe my little piggies.  Why do our feet have animal references anyway??? Recently I came across some information about epsom salt.  Turns out it is great to reduce inflammation and nice for exfoliating as well.  Out came the bubbly machine of wonder and pedicure time was born.  A rainy Sunday is a great excuse for some mama/daughter time.  Feet were soaked, heels were scrubbed, nails were done.  My feet feel refreshed and the cost was almost nothing.  We are thinking of implementing a new routine since we could get used to this.  Sometimes the new thing is a classic old thing that you've just never tried.  All I know is this was a salt themed weekend.  Maybe the next salt themed weekend can include the briny water of an ocean and some sweat from walking in the sand...

Skinny Margarita

     We had things to celebrate today and we found ourselves at the Olive Garden with a gift card.  I was the girl who would have her signature picks at her specific places.  I didn't deviate much.  This new thing has made it fun to branch out.  Today, I picked a "Skinny Margarita" from the drink menu.  The rim was loaded with salt and it was a delicious little treat without the guilt.  Here's a toast to the universe and a shot of tequila with some sweet agave nector to do it with!!!

Safety Not Guaranteed

     How many of us would use time travel if given the option?  What exactly would we go back to do? Would we tell people the things we should have a long time ago? Would we risk our own lives to save someone else?  More importantly who would respond to an ad in the paper looking for a partner to travel with?
     There are days I would.  I would take the risk and the machine and go back to do things differently.  I might save people.  I might save myself.  But you know some of us do time travel all of the time and don't even realize it.  We are on repeat.  We stay stuck in a place that passed us by.  We cling to a moment, a scent, a song, a memory, a person and go back whenever we need to...machine or not.  If we are trapped in a moment that "defined" us then we have traveled back over and over again to the past.   
     But the time and the people and the places are all a part of who we are now.  We don't know which one leads to which but if one were missing everything would be  different.  Could be a detriment  or a blessing but integral just the same. 
     Some of us spend our lives trying to go back in time to save the ones we love.  We try to help them get past the things that hold them hostage.  We risk life and limb and measure quantum physics.  We change calibrations and new approaches.  We write code.  We steal supplies.  Sometimes we hide to protect.  But basically we try to bend dimensions and go back in history hoping to right the wrongs...and we do it without the big machine.  Sometimes creating a big machine seems more plausible because the struggle seems far too complicated to handle without it.  Either way...safety is not guaranteed. 
     The movie itself was terrific and so was my night with my friend.  Hey Jenne, thanks so much for the big discovery at the end that made it even more brilliant!!! 
    

Facing Alzheimers

     For the past few years I have had many things to conquer.  They served as distractions.  Sometimes we just don't face things that are right in front of us.  Denial is a beautiful and wicked thing.  It gets confusing for me and my 86 year old father because I never know where the depression of a widower ends and the forgetfulness of an old man begins.  They blur.  Plus, he was always a little forgetful to begin with and has been the focus of many a teasing joke. 
     Tonight I will start to read "The 36-Hour Day".  (A family guide to caring for persons with Alzheimer Disease, Related Dementing Illnesses, and Memory Loss.)  This is all extra hard because I thought my mother and I would bounce back and forth with eye rolls and giggles to at least lighten the mood.  I thought we would be a team of advocates for his needs.  Turns out there is only me. 
     I know to be grateful each day because he is still quite lucid though the signs are building.  I try to remain patient but it is one of the trickiest things I've ever had to contend with.  I fear the day he forgets the big stuff.  I dread the day he forgets me.  I worry because he confuses children in photographs and calls my daughter by my nickname at times.  His past is getting blurry.  His today needs a steady reminder of the date and what we are all doing.  As for his tomorrow...none of us will know until another sun finds us in the morning sky.  I look back at my sweet memories to fuel me.  I try to remember that it is my turn to take care of him.  But the slow and steady loss is harder than any sudden loss.  The man he is becoming is not the man I've known.  This poses a conundrum.  Just like everything else... I will face it one day at a time...even if I have to remind him of what day that might be. 

Choklad Mork

     Had the meatballs.
     Had the lingonberries.
     Bought the random pillow.
     Got a dresser because my kid shouldn't still be getting his clothes out of a laundry basket.
     Should've gotten the last dresser at the place of the Dala Horse.
     Had a frozen yogurt in a cone.

     All been done.

Therefore....a choklad mork was purchased.  New thing done for the day Swedish style.  And yes  I thought about the classic 80's show because how could you not?!?